Kisses & Sex:

Claude:

"These are Fermi estimates built from partner-count surveys and assortative mating, not measured numbers.

Definitions

• Attractive: roughly the top 20% by broad outside consensus
• Highly attractive: roughly the top 5%

Per lifetime, average man	Attractive (top 20%)	Highly attractive (top 5%)
Going for a kiss (incl. rejections)	~2–5 times	~0–2 times (median ~0–1)
Different women he has sex with	~1–2 (median ~1)	~0–1 (median 0)
Share of men who ever have sex with one	~50–65%	~20–35%

How often he has sex with them

This is where the picture splits into two very different groups, because most sex happens inside long-term relationships, not one-offs.

• Men with a long-term partner from that tier. Because of assortative mating, very roughly 20–25% of men end up in a long relationship or marriage with a top-20% woman, and maybe 5–8% with a top-5% woman. For them, the count runs into the hundreds or even over a thousand times. Long-term couples average somewhere around once a week, declining with age and relationship length.
• Everyone else. These men have either zero encounters or a handful from short relationships or flings.

So the median man has sex with an attractive woman somewhere between zero and a few dozen times in his life. With a highly attractive woman, the median is zero. The mean is much higher, but only because a minority of men with long-term partners in those tiers pull it up.

Bottom line

For the typical man, a highly attractive partner is a rare or nonexistent event, while an attractive one is something he experiences with one or two women. Within the “attractive” tier, the distribution is very bimodal: either almost never, or regularly for years with one partner.

Keep in mind that most men rate their own partners as attractive, so these outside-consensus numbers say little about how men experience their own love lives."