Do People Get the Friends They Want?

Do People Get the Friends They Want? A Cross-Cultural Investigation

Menelaos Apostolou et al

Abstract

People desire friends who have qualities such as similarity, the ability to provide support, opportunities for socialisation, assistance in achieving self-serving goals and access to potential mates. In the current study, we aimed to examine the degree of overlap between the friends people consider ideal and those they actually have. Using a sample of 6224 participants from 12 countries, we found that, across five dimensions of friendship, ideal and actual friendships considerably overlapped and ideal preferences were significant and strong predictors of actual friendships. Still, the overlap between ideal and actual friendships was not complete; rather, a small deficit emerged, with participants getting less of what they wanted. These results were consistent across the 12 countries in our sample. We also found significant effects of the Dark Triad personality traits on several dimensions of friendship.

Interessante Gegenstände:

Was ist es genau, dieses spezielle Etwas, das einen Gegenstand interessant macht?

Mental Health and Happiness:

"Although there are disputes concerning the precise definition of mental health, most experts agree that the ability to be happy, or at least relatively contented, is a major hallmark of mental health and well-being."

Aaron Ben-Ze'ev

Cross-sex and intrasexual theory of mind

Cross-sex and intrasexual theory of mind: Perceptions of sex-typical sexual desires

Paola A. Baca, William Costello Rebecka K. Hahnel-Peeters, Andrew G. Thomas , David P. Schmitt, David M. Buss

Abstract

Theory of mind refers to the ability to infer the thoughts, motivations, and desires of others. Although traditionally studied as domain-general, an evolutionary psychology perspective leads to the hypothesis that theory of mind mechanisms may be sexually dimorphic in domains where male and female minds differ, such as sexual desires. Using an error management perspective, we conducted a preregistered study with 710 adults (452 men; M age = 34.54, SD = 12.26). We hypothesized that adaptive inferential biases such as men's sexual over-perception bias, would also be reflected in inferences about the typical sexual desires of the opposite sex. Drawing on three questions derived from Sexual Strategies Theory, we tested the predictions that men would (1) overestimate the number of sexual partners women desire, (2) underestimate the time women require before wanting sex, and (3) overestimate women's comfort with sex without love. In contrast, we predicted women would infer men's sexual desires more accurately. The results provided partial support for these predictions. Men overestimated women's desire for sexual variety and underestimated the time women required before engaging in sexual activity. Unexpectedly, women showed similar biases when estimating the desires of men. We also explored same-sex mindreading and found that both men and women overestimated the sexual desire of their same sex peers. We discuss possible explanations of this observed pattern. One invokes intrasexual competition, whereby individuals inflate perceptions of their peers' sexual desires to simultaneously derogate rivals, enhance their own mate value, and remain vigilant against mate poaching and infidelity threats. Unrestricted sociosexuality and Dark Triad traits, particularly psychopathy in both sexes, were associated with exaggerated perceptions of others' sexual desires. These findings contribute novel insights to the theory of mind literature and potential sources of conflict between the sexes.

Gute Beziehungen:

Eine gute Beziehung ist eine solche, wo sich jeder der Beteiligten gut entwickelt.

Aber auch gute Beziehungen können zu Ende gehen.

Lebenshaltung:

Eine klare Haltung gegenüber dem Leben versus Philosophielosigkeit

Formlosigkeit / Stillosigkeit:

Mancher Gemütlichkeit haftet schlichtweg auf etwas Formloses / Stilloses an.